With A Noose Around Your Neck

I’m applying for a job at Progressive insurance. Is it because i’m dying to work in the industry or because I want to be a call center representative? Hell No. I’m applying because it’s a better paying job than the one I have now, it has benefits after thirty days and will reimburse my tuition so I can continue my college education. The other major reason is they have a casual work environment and that is why, my post of the morning, is “I’m disappointed” in ties.

A lot of us dislike the work we do. Some of us even despise it. So many people get caught up in their career that they forgot to do what they love and have lost their passion for success a long time ago. You know what doesn’t help with that? Having a piece of fabric tied around your neck like a noose. A constant reminder that you work for “the man”.  I have no qualms about ties in certain occasions [even though I’d even prefer a less formal wedding] but I pity the man who has to wear one of our worst inventions, sucking away at his life force, on a daily basis.

The tie itself has origins in the 1600’s as a battle garment worn by Croatians. It started a fashion trend in Europe and hasn’t been removed from our necks since. The modern tie came around during the industrial revolution so the “peons” could have a tie that was easy to put on in the morning. Boo on you ties for ruining men and women’s lives [mostly men’s] since the dawn of modern civilization.

Its time to put warning labels on these garments. I’m not even concerned with chances of strangulation. peanuting [a form of bullying by pulling tightly on a tie], or entanglement. I want a label on it that warns of dissatisfaction with daily routine. I want people buying ties to know they’re going to feel hopeless and are going to quickly understand someone else controls their lives.

Where it really gets complicated, and why we can’t get out of this situation, is we’re in a Nash Equilibrium and game theory shows us why ties will probably never go away. A Nash Equilibrium is when a decision is reached by natural forces in game theory. It can be used for business strategy, social issues, life decisions, and almost anything else. In this “game” we have two options that each man [or woman, but I’m going to just keep saying man because they wear them more – I’m sorry ladies, in this category, you suffer less] has a choice between wearing a tie and not wearing a tie. For the example’s sake, lets assume both men are applying for the same job. If the only factor that is different between the two men is one is wearing a tie and the other is not, then the man wearing the tie will most likely have the upper hand because he appears more successful based off our society’s ideals. Both men will therefor wear a tie so they can compete on paper and not on appearance. They would both be better off not wearing a tie because they would both still be on the same playing level and both be more comfortable. The problem arises because if one of them wears a tie they gain the upper hand and there is no incentive not to. [In game theory this is refered to as cheating] When one party cheats it causes the other party to follow suit or they will be at a disadvantage. Because there is nothing to stop either party from cheating, they both cheat, and we result in the Nash Equilibrium where all men typically wear ties.

I’m done. I know my efforts against the tie community will always be in vain. The most I can hope for is to have a life filled with job opportunities that don’t need me to wear one. I own a few, I wear them when I have to but I feel sorry for the men in our society who wrap fabric around their neck on a daily basis. Best of luck to you and I hope your life of despair improves. I don’t blame you, it’s not you I’m disappointed in, it’s the tie.


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